Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff is one of those little books you buy to put in your house maybe under a glass coffee table or maybe on the little shelf in the powder room. This book was at my house before I even understood what it meant to "sweat the small stuff". I never read the book. I have no idea what words are printed on the insides, but I think that the title alone has taught me one of the most impacting lessons of my life.

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

It may for most be much easier said than done, but my mother uttered these words to me so many times over the years that it seems natural, just ingrained in my being. It is very easy to focus on the little things in life that get in the way- the little pebbles that work our way into our shoes, the time that I had to go into work at the office on a Saturday morning at 8am (ahem, that is right now). Instead of walking step after step and letting that little pebble dig it's way into your foot, just take off your shoe, dump out the pebble and move on with your travels. I am at work right now, and yes, it is inconvenient to be here on a Saturday morning, but it will lead to a successful delivery of my project and a gold star by name name on the merit board of Corporate America.While it is easy to see the downside of a situation in the moment, it is important to consider the outcome of it all and the overall impact on your life.

I was traveling once when I was twenty and was put into a very uncomfortable situation that upset me quite a bit. I was on a bus traveling between Paris and Barcelona, the bus would then continue down toward Africa. on the bus i had selected my seat and had been immediately asked to switch places with another man because he wanted to recline his chair to sleep. I tried to tell him that I also wanted to recline to sleep and there is no reason why he should get my chair to do so because I had been there first. He didn't speak English and I didn't speak whatever he did, so we were both muddling through this conversation in our respective languages with a few Spanish words, mainly "dormir" were used. I switched seats with him in order to avoid conflict.

Well it turns out that when I switched seats I was now placed in front of an angry man, who I assume, was on his way home to Africa. He was seated in an empty row as was I, with my backpack next to me. He then decided that he wanted to sit in my seat, and when I wouldn't move began to grunt and me and try to push me into the next seat. He too did not speak English, therefore this situation become very strange, very uncomfortable and very public. 

Finally an Australian guy pulled the man away and allowed me to get my things and move. Needless to say I was very mad and very confused and never wanted to ride on a bus again. 

I pulled out my journal and begin to write about what a terrible situation this was and how I was so upset and then finally my words turned around and I somehow started writing about this idea of "5 minutes for trivial matters". 5 minutes for trivial matters was the concept that if something negative happened in my life that I would allow myself to be upset and reflect on the incident for five minutes. If i decided that it was not going to really change anything about my life, that I would let it go and move on. I thought this was such a good idea. I recalled the whole situation on the bus while sitting behind the man and decided that while it was an upsetting event, my life wasn't worse in the long run. 

I thought it was such a clever concept, this 5 minutes... until later it hit me. All I had done was rename the book my mom had lying around. My mom and her words had been with me the whole time. 

What is the Small Stuff?

Throughout the years my mom had always told me about the small stuff. To me that means every day antics, the little things in passing. In March of 2012 when I was interviewing for my first big girl jobs I was left with 3 opportunities for work. I had a list of reasons for taking or leaving each that I continually ran through over and over in making this decision. I called my dad in a whirlwind of emotion rambling on my thoughts of these pros and cons. 

My dad said something along the lines of,  "Julie, calm down. This is only your first job. It is not forever. It could be six months or a few years. That is up to you. Just choose what you think is best. Don't sweat the small stuff."

This put it all into perspective- the small stuff and life.